BDSM explained

We have all heard of BDSM but I have to wonder how many of us actually know what this broad term means and what exactly it encompasses. BDSM stands for Bondage & Discipline, Dominance & Submission, Sadism & Masochism.  Bondage and discipline are very different from sadism and masochism and I’ve decided to clear these terms up for us!

B&D: Bondage is described as the practice of restraining for pleasure, meaning the use of handcuffs or rope to restrain one’s appendages. Bondage is the means to have perfect control over the submissive partner’s body. Through B&D, subs find comfort in being controlled and freed of any thoughts they may have. The Dom in B&D might even inflict tolerable pain upon their partner.

Discipline here, describes the rules and punishments that are put into place to control overt behavior in BDSM relationships. Although I have linked bondage and discipline together here, they are not always interlinked. Bondage can be practiced for fun without any form of discipline attached to it just as one can practice discipline without using bondage as a means to achieve that end.  It should also be noted that bondage is not always but usually is sexual.

D&S: Dominance and Submission go hand in hand. Ususally in these types of relationships there is some sort of pampering going on. For example, Master will ask me to serve him as a maid and a cook. If we were in a B&D relationship then he would not ask this of me but rather he would just want to do things to me like put me in a staccado position and flog me. In short D&S is the set of rituals and customs that involve one person submitting themselves to, and giving dominance to their partner. There are a wide range of fetishes that fall under the D&S category like cuckoldry, slavedom (depending on the individual case), petplay,etc.

the key phrase in D&S is Total Power Exchange since the submissive will give all control that they may have over themselves to their dominant partner. A D&S relationship can be a lifetsyle choice that is ongoing and permanent or it can be something that only takes place for short spurts of time.

S&M: Sadomasochism is derived from the two terms sadism and masochism. think about the Marquise de Sade when thinking about these two terms and you will be on the right track in trying to understand them. S&M refers to the physical aspect of BDSM and applies strictly to sexual and erotic scenarios. Meaning that it does not apply to the pain received during a car accident for example! Sadism being pleasure that is derived from inflicting physical pain, humiliation, degradation on another person and masochism being the experience of pleasure derived through receiving physical pain inflicted upon oneself. One can be in a D&S or even a B&D relationship that also involves S&M.

And so there you have it folks the breakdown of what BDSM really stands for. I could have gone a lot more indepth in this post but maybe I’ll save the juicy details for another day!

Related posts:

1. How to Start Exploring BDSM: A Beginner’s Guide
2. D/S 101 – Cerina X’s interesting take on things
3. Bondage Thoughts
4. Bondage + Chores = Fun!
5. User Submitted BDSM Art in Everydayslaves.com