Questions and Answers – Continued
by Slaveduties
A little while ago I posted a bunch of answers to some questions that I received in the comments section. Well, it so happens that user: “Rain_” asked some followup questions in the comments on that post, and the answers grew so long I decided to make another post about it. The picture I chose, for this one has to do with baring myself to all of you. That position is very “inspection” like. Whenever Master’s friends inspect me, that is how I am usually presented…so I guess thats why I feel that way. These Q&A posts really feel like I’m baring all to you, and it feels good…it feels great. I found that picture and it just felt right :) Now, on to the questions! And thank you Rain_ for them! And of course feel free to post more followup questions in the comments of this post if you so desire as well
1. How did you know your master was the right one to trust?
- It took some time to be honest, as I had been used for all the wrong reasons by several men in the past. As much as I enjoyed being used, being just a piece of meat…there was something different about them – they weren’t BDSM enthusiasts, they were just bad men that looked down on women in general. So when I met Master of course it took some time to realize that he was completely different. That he was a true BDSM enthusiast that understands the core concepts of “safe, sane, consensual”. It was when I realized that he was dominating me for my own desires as much as his, that I realized he was the one I could trust and see a life with.
2. How did you find your master, please explain exactly, was it a site or what?
- Good Old Alt.com :) We spoke on there for quite a while, used the webcam chat feature – then finally met at a café, at which point we’d spoken so much we kind of already knew each other. He was sitting in a chair at a table near the back when I arrived, the place was not super populated, but enough people to make me feel comfortable that nothing could happen (it’s important to meet in a neutral place first!). He had me kneel next to the table while we spoke. I remember the miniskirt he asked me to wear barely covered my ass while I was kneeling, and I know he could basically see my pussy from his position. An interesting first meeting indeed, but he made me feel so comfortable, and no one said anything about my kneeling there…which proved to me that out in the world, feeling self-concious is pretty useless, as no one really cares that much in this day in age, which is a great thing.
3. How do you continue to do it every day, being able to take so much? I know for an experienced woman like you it’s not hard, but what about for the beginners?
- It gets easier as you accept it. It’s the only life I know now…I don’t remember my life before, or what it felt like to be free. At first it was easy also, because I guess you could say I was love-struck…as time wore on though, and we settled in and it became the norm…it got harder, I had a little rebellious period and some second thoughts…then I settled really into the lifestyle and day-to-day, and it became easie againr, and it becomes easier every day. All I can say is take it day by day, and try and enjoy each little thing. Take pleasures when and where you can, keep your submissive feelings in your mind as much as you can – and as hard as it may be, try to accept your role mentally, constantly…remind yourself. Hopefully your dominant will reinforce it constantly, through a variety of actions that will help reinforce it in your mind
Follow me after the break to read the rest of the questions and answers:
4. How do I know that I am or am not right for the “Slave” Title?
- There are as many answers for this as there are days in your life. Some days you will be fit for the “Slave” title…you will feel like the ideal and perfect slave. Other days, or even other times of the same day, you will probably feel different. When you are forced to do something you really don’t feel like doing, you may not feel like you are right for the slave title, you just want to run away and give it all up. It’s natural to question things, and to question your life. There is no right or wrong answer to this, because it will change constantly.
5. What is the hardest thing you do?
- This question is super hard to answer…each thing I do is the hardest thing at the time! lol – it’s hard to explain. When my toes are touching the back of my head in my hogtie…that’s the hardest. When I’ve just endured the 50th canestroke on my inner theighs…that’s the hardest. When I’m sucking and swallowing the piss out of Master’s friend’s cock, so he doesn’t need to go to the bathroom and miss a part of the movie they are watching – that’s the hardest. I really can’t decide, and they are all on a different level in a way. I guess the thing I dread the most is the solitary bondage. When I’m put in a closet, or some-such for extended periods of time, in which I’m alone for a day or two tied up. That really messes with me mentally.
6. How did it first start out, you and your master in actual Bdsm acts? What did you do, was he patient or was it force? How did you react?
- If you mean in BDSM in general…I started out quite young. My friend and I were both very sexual, and both found our submissive tendencies together (thank you internet, and slumber parties! lol). We finally convinced a friend that was a boy to be our “pimp” and we started giving sexual favors for money to other guys. We asked him to hit us when we didn’t make him enough money…we were crazy, and I think just figuring out our submissive minds, and we really didn’t know what we were doing. We thought being used was the only thing involved with being a slave…I slowly learned that its not :) And I certainly don’t advocate that kind of behaviour to anyone! In terms of Master…we were both quite experienced by the time we met, so we fell right into it. There were a few days of finding my limits – and I think he was pleasantly surprised. I’d make him sweat flogging me…he’d have to hit a lot, and very hard to start hurting me…he moved on to a cane, which inflicted a lot more pain a lot more quickly, and got me screaming very fast. He learned that I would go to insane extremes before I used our safe-word, and he quickly learned how to keep me at the point right before I’d have to use it. He is an expert, an artist, a connaissuer of my pain threshold…he can keep me hovering at my limits for hours.
7. Were you scared at first, to have someone know whats best for you? Knowing you could trust someone fully with yourself?
- Quite the opposite, I finally felt safe and free and happy. If I am not owned I am scared…I feel like I can’t make my own way in the world, that I’m not protected or loved. I know that’s pathetic, and probably a step backwards in women’s-lib lol, but ultimately – thats just me. When I fell in love with Master…it was like coming home, and findind my place in life. I was not scared at all, and have not been since.
8. Do you ever get annoyed with what you do?
- Not quite sure I understand the question…do you mean, do I ever dislike what I have to do? For sure…I hate having to do a lot of the things I have to do. I hate being Master’s toilet in the morning, I get annoyed with having to clean the floor with a tooth brush and I’m on my hands and knees for 7 hours. Likewise, I get annoyed at myself when I screw up simple tasks, but the positive side of that is that I feel that I deserve the punishment, and so it feels cleansing for me.
9. I am a natural dominant, I have been a Femdom, I have figured out that I hate being dominant, How would I go about being something similar to you? Was there a site you learned what you do at? Or was it taught? If it was taught by who? And where can a Newbie like me find or figure out “The ropes.” No pun intended.
- It was a natural feeling that came to me. I feel the most turned on when I’m forced to do things I don’t want to do. That in essence is my fetish, I guess you could say. It was just developed over time, through many experiences. Through accepting and doing things I didn’t want to do, and enjoying it. I learned the basics, the ettiquete, and new ideas to offer Master from websites, but essentially each relationship is very different – and so it just takes time and practice to kind of figure out what to do, and how to feel.
10. What would you give advice to people like me Female and male alike?
- Dive in. Don’t be shy…conquer your fear. Experience life – only through experience will you figure out who you are and what you like. Get on sites like Alt.com, find someone to play with and indulge in all your fantasies. Don’t give up, even if you have a negative experience here or there. As someone who is naturally drawn to the BDSM lifestyle, it’s something that tends not to leave you. So even if you ignore the feelings, eventually they will build up and you will explode and potentially do something dangerous, such as offer someone too much control too quickly in order to subdue your submissive feelings. I did this a lot before Master, my submissive feelings were so strong that I gave away my body and mind to anyone that would take it. Being an attractive girl, there were many takers – and I gave them too much too fast, to the wrong people.
11. Where can I go to learn how to be a proper slave?
- Only you know what a proper slave is. Every person and every relationship is unique. Browsing sites like mine are a good start…reading the forums and communicating with other people will help define what you feel a proper slave is as well. BDSM porn in general is not an accurate representation of the BDSM lifestyle, however – it will show you things and give you ideas that you will not have come up with on your own. It will also help define what you like and don’t like, and develop your individual fetishes as well. I browse a lot of BDSM porn because it actually even motivates me to be who I am, it turns me on, it makes me even more sexual, it makes me love my life. I know that sounds crazy, but…that’s that :) There are things like the gorean positions which we’ve never really followed much, but I’ll do a little research and try and post some about it here…stuff like that might be what your looking for.
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Wow sucking and swallowing piss out of the masters friends cock so he dosent miss a part of the movie lol that certainly does come in handy lol i would definately appreciate that if i really wanted to watch a movie nice one slave duties
Quite a life these men in my life lead ;)
Your site is so helpful! I love reading your Q&As. :)
Thank you so much :) I love writing it!
i have heard you mention your friend from your younger years, the one you ‘shared a pimp with’ and i was just wondering-whatever happened to her? are you still in youch-is she even still submissive?
love your blog, your Master is very luck to have you xx
I haven’t spoken to her in quite some time unfortunately…she was forced to move away with her parents. Probably the worse couple of months of my life…she was my best friend, and the only other human being at the time I could relate to. I’m sure everyone’s suffered some kind of loss like that, it was brutal.
That being said, knowing her like I did, I’m pretty sure she is either a very active BDSM player, or a lifestyle slave herself somewhere. Her submissive tendencies were as powerful and all-encompassing as my own, so I know she must be in the scene. It’d be very cool to meet with her now and show her how far I’ve come, the things I can do, and am forced to do…she’d be very proud of me.
Hi. First off I want to say how much of a fan I am of your sight. I learn so much and can closely relate to what you have said. I have never been happier than on my hands and knees being of service to my Daddy. I feel so alone sometimes because I have an Alpha side (with work and the vanilla world) so that when I am finally allowed to spend time with Daddy it’s such a physical and emotional release. I do have a question however, have you ever been in a situation that was NOT safe or sane.. but still consensual?
Kind of a hard question to answer…
I have dangled 20 feet in the air from a tree by one ankle, with my hands in a reverse prayer position behind my back. Many would consider that not-safe, but I know Master’s knots are designed in such a way as to be physically impossible to let go.
So it depends on what you think of safe, I guess. I’ve been branded, which did permanent physical damage to my body, so technically that isn’t safe either. I’ve been drowned many times, that probably was pretty unsafe. I am fucked in all my holes by many men, which is probably the unsafest of them all…even if Master has insisted to see the paper’s of their tests, there is a chance.
So…I guess to answer your question, yes I do un-safe things. that being said, I don’t recommend them to anyone. Safety should be the #1 priority in all BDSM play sessions. We take every precaution and they are calculated risks, ones we feel very confident in.
I have another question. IT’s something that I’ve been wondering about since I began this journey into BDSM. I know someone asked what would happen if you decided you wanted to leave your master. However, I’ve been wondering what would happen if your master decided that he no longer wanted you? Would he be allowed to just throw you out on the street? Or sell you to someone else? Do you have rights in that capacity or would you be at his mercy?
For exactly this purpose, Master decided that once we realized how serious this was, we got legally married. No reception, no party…just for the paper. He wanted me to know that I was protected, that as little of a human being that I still am – that he could not put me on the street, because he knows…he knows all too well that I would be lost. I wouldn’t know what to do. I haven’t lived in the “real world” for years. I’m still relatively young, and in my 20′s – so I guess I would adapt, but regardless…it would be very difficult.
He very well could’ve easily not gotten married to me for this purpose…it’s not a real marriage after all, and I would be with him and love him equally if he hadn’t…but that’s the type of Man and Master he is. He is not evil, he is my protector :)
I just found your site a bit ago via google.. you have lots of interesting posts, I’ve enjoyed them so far. I do have a question though–you mention being used by multiple men.. do they typically use condoms? Or do you rely on birth control and your Master’s judgement to be safe from diseases/unwanted pregnancy?
I have a few questions, also, as one interested in leading a 24/7 relationship (as a slave of course! I am no where near as smart or commanding or brave and strong as a Master could be) (:
1) Are you still going to be shelved and boxed permanently when you reach 30/when you are no longer deemed useful?
2) You are allowed to speak again, I presume? If not, how do you do it? How DID you not speak for 9+ months? I’m not sure I could give that up.
3) Are your permanent body modifications still on-going? What has been happening in that regard?
4) When did you become sure that your Master is the one you would like to have for life? (This might be a repeat, sorry if it is, but I am struggling with this myself. Sometimes I feel he’s the one I can take it to the 24/7 level with, but sometimes, I’m uncertain…)
5) Is there any age you consider to young to do BDSM play? (after they’ve reached sexual maturity, of course!)
6) How did you get rid of your gag reflex? I’m trying to train mine, but it doesn’t seem to be working as well as I hoped it would…
7) What if your parents decided to come visit? What would you/your Master do?
8) I find (when I do submit within the context of a scene) that I’m a rather bratty submissive. Is there any way to cure this? (I think it’s perhaps I want the punishment, and my Master does not punish me enough… He is too forgiving.)
9) If you were given a completely free day (no collar, dress how ever you want, go anywhere you want) what would you do? Or would you just be horribly confused? lol :)
10) Do you have a safe word? Are you allowed to use it? If you’re feeling sick, or under the weather, what would your Master do?
11) Last one: what would your Master do if you got pregnant? (Hey, accidents happen. I’m here because of one such accident ;) )
I’m honestly curious about the dynamic in a 24/7 relationship, and whether it would work for me. Thank you in advance for taking the time to answer my questions. I love your blog, I’ve read through the entire thing in the past few weeks, just masturbating and alternately wishing for a life like yours! (Also, have you ever done scat play? I would love to suck my Masters dick and drink his sweet urine, but the idea just turns him off entirely, but the more I read about it, the more toilet slavery gets me wet! [Well, maybe not scat play...]) :) Take care! ~tris
[...] #2 Questions and Answers Continued [...]
i’ve been about 5 years as a slave. At 1st i kept changing Masters but it’s been a year after i signed as a permanent slave to a Master. Even i just met Him 2 weeks before i made the decision but i just knew that He is the One.
Everyday is a learning and training day since He is a very demanding Master, (i think all Dom are demanding,don’t they?), but i try to love and enjoy the proccess. He loves bondage and whipping but He doesn’t like seeing me orgasms to often. So now, i may have that once a month, if He decided not to give, it means i must wait for next month. The rest i must hold the orgasms. When i failed then He will punish me
Now it’s been 3 months after my last orgasms. Even almost everynight He brings me to the edge. Im His domestic slave, sex slave and pet slave to Him. But to His friends, im a pain slave that i must endure long session of torture. Once i failed to please His friends then He punished me of humiliate Him in front of His friends.
So, being a slave i think its a huge decision with a huge responsibilities too.
I’m looking at your site…… and have so many questions…… you said you are Masters toilet??? Do you all know how unsafe that is to have someone urinating and deficating in your mouth? See, I wouldn’t mind being tied up lightly and maybe blindfolded so I can’t see what kind of caress or kiss or soft love nips and such were coming so it’d be more erotic, but being physically harmed and made to be gang raped by tons of men? That to me would be something I’d have to put my foot down and say no to. I’d be a better sub than dom as I’d start giggling trying to tell someone what to do and that I can NOT make another person suffer or be in pain; I’d cry, personally….. But I’m just trying to understand how someone who is a human with feelings, equal rights and so on feels that eating someones piss and shit is safe, normal, okay and … my gods. That… you’re a human being! A free person! Not a toilet! You’re going to suffer horrifying disease you could die from, hon! Being tied up and spanked gently and love nips are one thing. Getting E-coli, aids and so on is another. Sweetie, you’re worth so much more than that. Being beaten and stuff isn’t the answer. You’re your own person with rights, choices, and a gift of life. I know you think you’re happy but…. being a toilet for another human? It’s like he’s saying you’re nothing but a waste holder. They don’t even do that in the horrible 3rd world countries where women don’t even HAVE rights! hugs.
i have been reading your blog -what an amazing creature you are and someone that i will most certainly look up to. i am a new slave. i found my Master a week ago after so many years of search, and on Wednesday is when we meet. we have spoken for hours on the telephone – He being kind and patient – i being excited and nervous. i no longer have any reservations at all – i am excited and feel very at peace – i belong soul and spirit to my Master and on Wednesday He will also own my body – but oh, i am so so terrified of letting him down, disappointing him – i wonder to myself, can i actually do this – my chance has come and what if a) i completely bottle it, or b) c) d) and so on…… He has been good and kind, i have my positions and my rules, all of which i know by heart – by i also know that when it comes to the crunch – everything will fly out of my head – Please, this new slave would be so very appreciative of some advice – i have agreed to meet with him in a dungeon, the dungeon master is going to undress me and redress me, and put me into a position that my Master has requested – when i am ready, he will then come to claim me -
i want to be a slave commited one
I’m a Dom but I’m really so new to it. Reading your site has helped. I would like a slave, I have so much to learn. Its a little scary just because its still so new to me.